yes, i'm mildly insane.

i'm about to be insanely busy at work today. ugh. i'm taking a pre-break, before i get my hands dirty...because, i really need to gear up for the suck my day is about to become. i'd explain, but it wouldn't make any sense. just....it sucks.

i had a dream about my baby last night. only, he wasn't my baby....but he was. that tends to be the theme of my baby dreams. he belongs to someone else, yet when i look at him i just know he's mine. in the dream i woke up one morning to find that husband had left the front door open all night long. i was afraid to do anything around the house, so i asked him to check every room for anything suspicious. he checked everything, and i said "don't forget about the basement". ps - my house doesn't have a basement.

so he went down into this imaginary basement, came back upstairs with an infant in his arms and said "this little guy has been down there for 4 days!". how he knew that? no idea. so he handed me the baby...and for some reason i was suddenly topless. as soon as he handed me the baby, it tried nursing on me...only i was still pregnant, and had nothing to give. but i held him and let him anyway because i figured it was comforting him. strange. so i started to panic and told husband to hurry up and buy a car seat so we could go buy him some formula and then find out who his parents are (i don't really understand why he couldn't just go buy some formula, rather than buy the car seat first so we could all go...).

as the dream progressed i was taking this baby with me everywhere and totally falling in love with him. however, when i told people about him they looked at me like i was crazy. i couldn't figure it out. at one point i was talking with my friend about the baby, and showing her pictures of him. she looked up at me and said, "these pictures are blank, what are you talking about?". so then i started feeling crazy, and she started telling me how it was a manifestation of my own mind to cope with something....i have no idea what. in my dream she sounded like an expert, though. so then i came around eventually, the baby disappeared, and i started missing him like crazy and wishing it was time for my baby to arrive.

yes, i suspect drugs as well.

i need to get to that hell of a job i have...but i just wanted to document my smile of the day, because i'm amazed that it's 8:26am and i've already had my heart warmed :)

smile of the day:
yesterday i helped out one of the new girls - hmm, let's call her G. i have been known to be annoyed by a few of her actions, but for the most part i like her. she is going to take over a few of my jobs while i'm on maternity leave (or, that's what they think i'm doing for now, anyway), so i've been training her. in the middle of this she asked me for a post-it note, and i told her i was out. office supplies are pretty scarce around here. so this morning, she comes in and said "hey...i just wanted to give you this since i know you're out of post-its, i made it for you". she handed me a stack of paper that she cut down to nearly-post-it size & stapled them together at the top. i couldn't believe how sweet that was!